Could LG be prepping another touch interface handset like its KE-850 Prada from earlier in the year? Word is the new handset will definitely (by definitely we mean, definitely possible) be sporting GSM, UMTS, and potentially HSDPA — all in unknown bands, of course. Apparently LG’s new device is based on Windows Mobile 6, takes it shape cues from the Samsung Blackjack, and comes a packin’ WiFi as at least one of its alternate connectivity options. Fitted with only the two call keys, and trimmed with chrome — or chromed plastic — it should be a sassy bit of work. We look forward to its rumored roll out this September.
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
LG working on Windows Mobile 6 Prada-esque handset?
The Motorola Z9
The Boy Genius has done it again, this time by outing the new Motorola Z9 slider phone. Its styling looks very similar to the RAZR 2 — mainly due to the large primary screen — although since the model that the Boy Genius got his hands on has some very deep AT&T branding, we’d have to say the similarities end there. Beyond the design the Z9 features 3G, a 2 megapixel camera with flash (no word on whether it’s a “real” flash), Motorola’s Synergy OS, support for AT&T’s Live Video Share, and a microSD card slot. We’re sure we’ll be hearing a lot more about this phone over the coming days: for now, head over to The Boy Genius Report to check out a gallery of shots of the phone.
Nokia’s 8GB N95 confirmed for Q4 release?
Not a whole lot of new information here, but we’re starting hear that the 8GB N95 that was mentioned just days ago as a potential device will in fact become a reality. Unfortunately, we’re still forced to treat this “confirmation” as a rumor until Nokia fesses up to the pictured device, but if whispers prove true, it should hit outlets “shortly after Christmas,” will be black in color, tout 8GB of internal capacity, and sport a slightly larger screen for good measure. Hold tight — we’re sure a confirmation (or vehement denial) will be just around the bend.
iPhone nano rumors heating up, destined for Q4?
While analysts have been speculating that Apple may unleash a smaller (and cheaper) handset in the not too distant future in order to grab a sect of market share not interested in the relatively pricey iPhone, the rumors are seeming to gain traction. According to Kevin Chang, a JP Morgan analyst based in Taiwan, Apple is actually looking to “launch a cheaper version of the iPhone in the fourth quarter that could be based on its iPod nano music player.” The report cited anonymous sources “in the supply channel” and also referenced the now-famed patent that suggests such a device could be materializing. Still, we’d highly recommend taking all of this in with a healthy heap of salt for the time being, but don’t be incredibly shocked if your next iPod nano unexpectedly rings while you’re stereotypically browsing through Gorillaz tracks.
Motorola W385, new LG Chocolates live on Verizon
Thinking back to when we first caught wind of it, the turnaround on the ambiguously named VX8550 Chocolate from LG wasn’t that bad — but the same can’t be said of Verizon’s other retail introduction today, the midrange Motorola W385. This thing’s been kicking around as a rumored Big Red device since April at the latest — and yes, we’ll admit that our sense of time is a bit skewed, but that’s, like, forever. Anyhoo, pick up the VGA-cam’d, 160 x 128 screen’d W385 for $70 after all the contracts and discounts have been applied; meanwhile, the VX8500 successor can be yours for a nice, round hundie.
Mobile Sites
Following is the list of the sites that provide us free mobile stuff.Have a look at.
For some of the sites u may need to register to download.
1)http://www.getjar.com
2)http://www.dotsis.com
3)http://www.funatoz.com/
4)http://mobileshopindia.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=189
5)http://www.zedge.net
6)http://www.kollmobile.com
7)http://www.mobango.com
8)http://www.mobcrop.com
9)http://www.mobile9.com
10)http://www.mastmobile.com
11)http://www.funmaza.com
Symbian OS 9.1 Applications
Following is the list of softwares for Symbian OS 9.1,and a brief description about the applications.
ALON Contact Guide
ALON Contact Guide for S60 3rd Edition is professional contact manager which offers the quick contact search,
full set of actions with contacts and many other useful features.
AppUidViewer
AppUidViewer is a utility that can be used to find out all installed applications and their application UIDs on a device at run time.
AquaCalendar
Calendar, Tasks, Contacts, Messages, Birthdays all-in-one! You will forget about build in calendar.
Icons, Templates, Categories now available on Symbian OS.
Link Contact from Phonebook to your events and call to your friends.
Application works with built-in databases, so easily synchronize with PC.
Note! Reg. with code 100
Audiobay Podcast Player
The AudioBay Podcast Player makes it simple to find, download and listen to podcasts!
Features:
+Mobile Select Podcast Directory.
+Integrated search by location .
+Integrated MP3 player.
+RSS compatible.
+Memory card support.
Auto Hang Up
Auto Hang Up is the tool that helps you to reduce call charges.
The program automatically hangs up incoming or outgoing call after user specified duration.
Don't pay for an extra minute of conversation because of two seconds.
AutoLock
AutoLock is an automatic key lock application.
Features:
Automatic start-up when the phone is turned on.
Setup tool to change inactivity time.
It's running completely at the background.
AutoPilot
Personalized greetings for every caller!
Features:
+Set default auto response and save voice messages directly to your phone's internal memory without using your operator's voice mail.
+Set personalized voice responses and save voice messages.
+Personalized SMS responses (when somebody calls, the SMS response will be sent).
+Reject unwanted calls (blacklist feature).
+Call back the received call numbers.
+Save local voice clip files.
+Get complete call log.
+Playback saved voice messages.
+Transfer saved voice messages via Infrared, Bluetooth, Email or MMS.
Bemused v1.72
Bemused is a system which allows you to control Winamp and several other programs using your Nokia 7650 or 3650, or Sony Ericsson P800. It
consists of two parts: a server program which runs on your PC, and a client program which runs on your phone. It allows you to do the following
things:
Bible
Features:
Multiple bible version.
Normal/Fullscreen viewing.
Redefineable for key bindings Series 60 (useful for those cell phones that there are strange key placement, like the Nokia 3650 and Siemens SX1).
Navigation menu.
Booklist navigation.
Bookmark.
Option to keep the backlight always on.
History.
Color selection.
Greek/Hebrew text.
Limited support for Chinese (Big5 encoded) texts.
Copy to see to clipboard (under you dog paste them on your SMS/MMS/Notes).
BlackBaller
As only Killer Mobile could, BlackBaller combines the must have features of a Blacklist application,
with the convenience of a call filter (whitelist) and toss in a couple of never before seen features for good measure.
Features:
Instantly rejects Calls, SMS and MMS messages
Supports Blacklists and Whitelists
The easist most user friendly app around - true Killer Mobile style
Smart Reject Sensor (tm)lets you add blocked callers on the fly!
Tight integration with contacts
Real "Run in Background" mode
Complete log off all blocked Calls and Messages
BT WebCamera
WebCam computer connected via cell phone with Bluetooth.
facilitate your work, the journey for video applications.
Support QQ, MSN, NetMeeting and other mainstream video applications.
Support: E50,S60v3 9.1/9.2.
Support Windows Platform: 2000 or XP.
Tested on: N80, 3250, N73 work but small video.
Calcium
Calcium is a fast, easy to use calculator for your phone!
Calendar Delete
It Deletes all of your Calendar Entries!
ColEm. (with 6 Rom)
ColEm will run ColecoVision cartridge files with .cv, .cv.gz, .rom, and .rom.gz extensions.
Place your files into E:\Others\ColEm and don't forget to put COLEM.ROM
Divx Player
Play divx video files on your mobile phone!
Supported devices: Nokia E60, E61, E70, N71, N80, N91, N92, 5500
exoVirusStop
Protect your Symbian Series 60 phone against viruses and trojans, with the new antivirus product from exoSyphen Studios.
exoVirusStop brings some new and innovative features, which make this software unique.
All updates for this software are completely free, for lifetime. Stop paying expensive subscription fees,
when you can have lifetime free updates at NO cost.
F_Secure AntiVirus
F-Secure Mobile Anti-Virus(TM) is easy to use and does not require excess device resources or unnecessary user interaction.
It automatically scans all files in the background, both in the device and on the memory cards.
When an infected file is detected it is immediately quarantined to protect all other data in the system.
The antivirus database is updated invisibly in the background when a data connection is used for emails, web browsing etc.
Handy Clock
Handy Clock is a great time and multi-alarm tool. It shows time and date in your home city and in two other cities of the world.
You can choose these cities from the list, built in Handy Clock program, or add the new ones. Handy Clock shows current time in both digital and analog
formats.
Handy Clock shows you date and day of the week. You can also see the dialing codes of the chosen cities on the Clock screen.
Handy Clock enables you to set several different alarms on your clock.
You can set up to 8 clock alarms at the same time. The program supports 5 types of alarms.
Handy Safe
Handy Safe software for Symbian S60 smartphones is a perfect assistant for secure and convenient data managing.
Keep your mind free from countless numbers and letters. Have all of your important information in one place, safe, easy to access,
and always with you with Handy Safe software for Symbian S60.
Handy Safe Desktop agent included enables you to synchronize your information between Symbian S60 smartphone and PC.
Store passwords, credit cards details, user names, codes, accounts (email, Internet, shopping, bank),
web pages, addresses, travel info, insurance policies, software keys and much more.
Handy Safe software for Symbian S60 smartphone includes HANDY SAFE DESKTOP agent.
Handy Safe Desktop is a PC companion for Handy Safe software that is specially designed for synchronization of information on your smartphone and on your PC. With Desktop PC client you can easily add, edit and access your Symbian S60 smartphone information on PC.
Handy Keylock
Lock your smartphone keys when you don’t use it.
Set the timeout once and your smartphone will be automatically locked and protected against accidental pressings.
For slider phones (like Nokia N80): Smartphone keys will be locked automatically at slider closing (without confirmation message).
Handy Taskman
Be in full control of your smartphone!
Have full information about running programs and about free memory left on the phone (RAM, Phone memory and Memory card).
Access to applications is extra easy and quick: Find and start a desired application by typing the first letters of its name.
Or run a program from full screen list of applications that were recently used.
Switch to, Close, Kill any application or Close them all in one click. And even compress your smartphone’s memory using Handy Taskman.
HandyZip
Open, extract and create zip archives on your phone with Handy Zip application for Nokia S60 smartphones.
Handy Zip program is necessary for all people who receive messages via e-mail on the smartphone.
With Handy Zip software installed on your phone, you can easily open a zipped attachment directly from Messaging application and view/modify the files inside it. Without this application you can't check what is inside .zip archive you received with the message.
Just imagine what will happen if important document is not read in time.
Compress sending files into .zip archive and size of your message will dramatically decrease.
Less size of message means less time to send it and less Internet traffic bills.
Handy Zip software also helps you organize your messages. You can send several files zipped in one attached to your e-mail instead of many.
Keep more information on your phone with Handy Zip program for Nokia S60 smartphones. Compress unused files and save more new documents or images on the freed space. Compression is very easy and fast.When you need you will quickly extract these files.
Download zip archives from the Internet and extract them directly on your phone.
Organize and backup files on your smartphone using zip archives with Handy Zip application.
Compatible phone models:
Nokia 3250, 5500, N71, N73, N80, N91, N92, N93, E50, E60, E61, E62, E70
HeadLine News
Comprehensive headline news, market updates, sports, entertainment and more on your mobile devices!
Image Converter
Convert your pix to Formats:
1. Png
2. Mbm
3. Gif
4. Jpeg
5. Bmp
KeypadLock
KeypadLock runs as a service on your device and is able to automatically lock the keypad of your device based on the rules you set.
This can help you to protect against accidentally keys pressing which could initiate undesired calls or network access.
You can unlock the keypad as normally. You can set the inactivity timeout after which the keypad is locked.
You can also make use of the extended capabilities of the software. KeypadLock runs in background,
makes use of low resources from your device and it can also automatically start without your intervention when the phone is powered-on (autoboot).
Compatible devices : Nokia: N93,N92,N91,N80,N71,N73,E61,E70,E60,E50,3250,E50,E 500
LivePVR
Phone call PVR.
Phone call PVR is the personal voice recorder mobile application that provides real time phone call recording using Automatic or Manual capture modes.
It allows you to record your mobile phone conversations, either by recording all phone calls automatically, or by recording the next call you make.
Meeting Notes PVR.
Meeting Notes PVR is the personal voice recorder mobile application that provides real time meeting notes using Timed or Manual capture modes.
It allows you to record moments-in-time, or "thoughts" during a meeting, but without missing the context that led up to that main point or thought.
Using pre-defined application settings, a certain number of seconds are recorded using the Rolling Buffer, both before and after pressing the Timed Capture.
This ensures you always have proper context to your recordings. By also providing synchronization capabilities with ActiveSync,
you can have these recordings, with their meeting context, embedded in your Microsoft OneNote files or other note taking applications.
Voice recorder PVR.
Voice PVR is the personal voice recorder mobile application that provides basic voice recorder functionality, without
the limits on how long you can record. As long as you have storage, such as an SD Card in your phone, you can record
whatever you wold like, for as long as you would like.
Metro
helps you find your way in the public transport systems (subway, bus, trams, ...) in more than 350 cities around the world. FREE, FAST and ACCURATE!
mLock
Easy enable the keylock! Very useful for the Nokia N80
Phone Mobile Task
With this application, you can start and stop any application bases on a timepoint as well as a certain duration.
You can use it for example for a sleep timer to turn of radio/media player automatically after some minutes.
Features:
start/stop of applications.
selection of any installed application possible.
load and save of jobs.
directly start any specific application in application list with ok/joystick button .
Mobile Weather
Mobile Weather is a weather forecast client for S60 Smartphones,
that shows the current weather situation of hundreds of cities anywhere all around the world!
Office Suite
Carry your office documents with you anywhere anytime.
Moreover, with OfficeSuite it is as easy as ABC to create dynamic text documents, calculate and analyze data right on your phone.
Need to modify an existing office document on the go?
No worries OfficeSuite will keep the original document format and still allow you to make the desired changes.
Papyrus
Manage your busy life with Papyrus and your mobile phone. Papyrus is a robust time management solution for Symbian series 60 devices.
Papyrus offers many smart views and powerful tools to manage and keep track of your schedule. This is how your Symbian 60 is supposed to act!
Papyrus can be synchronized with your desktop Outlook using the Nokia PC suite,
including an item's note/description fields (For Symbian 7 or higher) that are missing when using the default calendar application.
NEW! Papyrus 1.2 new release featuring full Symbian 3rd edition devices support, landscape and portrait orientations support and much more!
ParkSuite
If you have the Nokia N80 or N91 mobile phone you can download a 3 in 1 software package that includes the following:
*ParkWiFi Detector
This handy application will automatically detect a free Nokia ParkWiFi network in the range and get you connected in quickly.
*Park Channels
Channels is a state of the art mobile media browser in you pocket ? with Channels you can access content from leading media companies in an easy to use and convenient fashion.
*ParkCast
With ParkCast you can listen to radio over the WiFi on your mobile.
Pdf+
Pdf+ is a viewer for Adobe® Acrobat® files, also known as Portable Document Format (or PDF) files.
With Pdf+ you can:
Display all the PDF files you have stored on your device and select them quickly and easily.
Read password-protected (40 bit and 128 bit encrypted) PDF files.
Display the text, line drawings and images in a PDF file, including (among others) Chinese PDF documents.
View and follow bookmarks.
Search for and follow links.
Use shortcuts for fast access to often-used commands.
Reflow the text in a document using DCR Technology so that it fits to the screen.
Zoom in and out to maximize the amount of text and graphics you can read on the screen.
Use the entire screen for displaying a page, and rotate the screen.
Search for strings in the text of the document.
Send a PDF file to anybody in the world, using Email, Infrared or Bluetooth.
Display PDF files that are attached to emails.
Devlex PhonePoint
PhonePoint is a bluetooth PowerPoint controller for your mobile device.
Its the professional wireless presentation tool.
It has been designed from the ground up as a tool for presenters;
slowly fine tuned with feedback from these professionals,
people for whom presentations play an essential role in their job.
Whether an occasional PowerPoint user or, if indeed, presentations are a critical part of your job,
PhonePoint will give you a competitive and polished edge when delivering PowerPoint presentations.
With PhonePoint you can concentrate upon just the presentation and the audience, leaving the PC well alone
PhotoRite SP
Add creative photo frames and funny magic mirrors and much more amazing effects as you take photos or on saved pictures.
PhotoRite SP is a Camera, Editor and Viewer all-in-one imaging application for your camera phone.
Main features includes:
* Take amazing photos with great effects.
* Fully compatible with on-phone camera.
* Real-time preview of effects and photo frames.
* Save as different resolutions as supported by the handset.
* 8x digital zoom.
PicoBlogger
Now, blogging from your phone is easier than ever. Whether you use Blogger, LiveJournal or Wordpress with PicoBlogger 3,
you can publish and download videos, photos, and audio files. Turn AutoBlogger on, to experience one-click mobile blogging.
Pocket Ogg
Play .ogg music files on the move.
Pocket Ogg is the ultimate high-quality music player for your phone!
Features:
* High-quality gapless music playback - no silence between tracks
* Easy to use intuitive playback controls
* Quick Resume - continue playback of long tracks, such as DJ mixes or audiobooks
* Shuffle and Repeat playback modes
* Create and edit unlimited playlists
* Support for Nokia 3250 music controls
* Full telephone integration - music automatically pauses for incoming calls
* Play music from any folder on your memory card
Compatiable Devices:
Nokia 3250, Nokia 5500, Nokia E50, Nokia E60, Nokia E61, Nokia E62, Nokia E70, Nokia N71, Nokia N73, Nokia N80, Nokia N91
QuickMark
What is the QuickMark?
The QuickMark is a 2D Barcode Reader.Once installed, you can scan 2D Barcodes and the content of the 2D Barcode is then immediately resolved on the phone.
2D Barcodes (QR Code, Datamatrix) can hold several types of information:
+an URL, respectively a mobile site's address,
+a SMS message,
+a phone number,
+any kind of text,
+an email address,
SpotOn
SpotOn keeps your display backlight permanently on.
If your smartphone (e.g. Nokia N80, N90) supports a camera-flash, you will be able to turn it on/off too.
Sun Compass
Sun Compass is a program to show the north direction from the sun or moon position. It also gives you the direction to Makkah.
There are two ways of use:
1. the north is at the top of your phone: hold it with direction of the red arrow to the sun or moon.
2. the sun or moon is on top of the phone: the red arrow gives you the north direction.
Symella
Symella is a Gnutella client for Symbian smartphones!
Gnutella is a popular Peer-to-Peer file sharing network with several users from all around the world.
Symella supports multi-threaded downloads which means that if multiple users have a particular file,
then Symella can download the file from several locations simultenously
SysInfo
Features includes:
Hardware and CPU details.
Series 60 platform version and build number.
Uikon and various servers version and build number.
Drive informations (type, format, size).
Installed application list and details.
Screen details.
Rom details.
Bluetooth version and class...
Tha app also includes a monitor that spy various phone events, like current cell, etc...
EPOCWARE.Handy.Expense.v2.03
Learn where your money is gone during your business trip or holiday.
Don’t pay travel expenses from your pocket! Calculate them all with
Handy Expense software for Nokia S60 smartphones.
It’s always on hand. Few seconds and a new expense is in your phone.
You will never forget or lose it. Claim back from your company every
dollar you spent.
We make all for more convenient data entry. Create your own specific
types of expenses and add any currency. Make it in advance and
choose when you need in a matter of seconds. The most often used
settings will always be on the top of list.
Analyze your expenses with Handy Expense software for Nokia S60
smartphones. It’s as easy as ABC to know how much you spent for
example on business meal or how much you paid in cash during some
date range. Send the finished report via SMS or e-mail.
You don’t need to care about expense report. We made it for you
Just export your expenses on your PC, open them in Microsoft Excel
and your report is ready.
So keep your time and money. Let Handy Expense software think about
your expenses
Languages supported
Arabic, Bulgarian, Chinese, Czech, Dutch, English, French, German,
Greek, Hungarian, Italian, Norwegian, Polish, Portuguese, Romanian,
Russian, Slovak, Slovenian, Spanish, Swedish, Turkish
Lonley Cat Games ProfiMail
ProfiMail is a powerful e-mail client for mobile devices. It allows you to read your mail on go, and send text with attachments directly from your device.
* HTML text
* Attachments
* and more...
http://www.lonelycatgames.com/?app=profimail
Shape Services IM Plus v 6.05
IM+ users can use the same accounts on mobile devices and PC regardless of the mobile operator - it's very convenient for using in business trips.
Key Features:
Direct and simultaneous connection to all supported IM systems: MSN®, AOL™, Yahoo!® Google® Talk,ICQ® and Jabber®
Mobile-to-Mobile and Mobile-to-PC real-time communication.
Zensis Photo Rite
Description: Capture and enhance photos to have much better appearance! Add creative photo frames and funny magic mirror and much more amazing effects as you take photos or on saved photos! The PhotoRite SP for Symbian Series 60 is a Camera, Editor, Viewer all-in-one imaging application for your camera phone. Main features includes:
Compatible with NOKIA 6600/6620, 7610, 6260, 6630, 6670, 3230, 3250, 6680, 6681, 6682, N70, N90 Support Traditional Chinese, Simplified Chinese and English.
Power Mp3 Player
Nice Audio Player For your mobile
ALON MP3 Dictaphone for S60 3rd Edition
ALON MP3 Dictaphone for S60 3rd Edition is the first high-quality MP3 dictaphone which also supports AMR and WAV audio formats for recording, phone calls recorder and MP3, OGG, AAC/MP4/M4A, AMR, WAV audio player with built-in 3-Band Parametric Equalizer , hot buttons and M3U playlists.
Now you receive three applications instead of one: voice dictaphone, phone calls recorder and music player! You may easily turn your smartphone into advanced digital dictaphone and start to record lectures, conversations, interviews and phone calls. On the other hand you need not to spend money to music player - with ALON MP3 Dictaphone you can listen to your favourite music in MP3, OGG, AAC/MP4/M4A, AMR and WAV - the most popular audio formats.
Contacts Transfer
With the Contacts Transfer application you can copy the entire contents of the contacts database includig thumbnail images and caller groups from one phone to another via bluetooth, infra-red or a memory card.
Download the following links for these softwares.
Dowload Links
link1 (14.31 MB)
link2 (13.68 MB)
Cool Games
Hello Friends!
Here are a bunch of Games.I hope you will enjoy with this collection.
If you really like these games and feel they are useful,please don't forget to give a comment.
Please open the links in a new browser
Cool Games
More Games
Some More Games
FUN SMS(INDIAN)
Please open the followig links in a new window.
Absurd SMS
ASCII Picture SMS
Best Of Luck SMS
BirthDay SMS
Blondes SMS
Clinton SMS
ComeBack SMS
Cricket SMS
Crude SMS
Dard E Dil Shayeri
Daring SMS
DecentSMS
Definition SMS
Exam SMS
Father's Day SMS
Flirt SMS
Friendship SMS
Funny Sayings
Funny Shayeri
Funny SMS
Game SMS
Good Morning SMS
Good Night SMS
Greeting SMS
I MISS YOU SMS
Inspirational SMS
Insulting SMS
Islamic SMS
KISS SMS
Love SMS
Love Story SMS
Marriage SMS
One Liners SMS
Pick Up Lines SMS
Puzzle SMS
Question And Answers SMS
Reason Why SMS
Relationship SMS
Sardar SMS
Shayari SMS
Sorry SMS
Teacher And Student SMS
Word Game SMS
Ultimate Stories
Friday, July 6, 2007
Nokia N95 one-ups Apple’s iPhone via unrefined display ‘hack’
There’s no denying that we were fairly taken aback by the beauty of the iPhone’s screen, but leave it to a clever (and likely bitter) N95 owner to trump Apple’s best shot with his very Nokia. While not nearly as ingenious as converting the device into a mapmaker, this crude demonstration explains how to increase the screen real estate linked to the N95 if you’re willing to sacrifice your left (or right) arm. Granted, the “hack” did begin with a broken N95, so strapping a portable TV onto one’s forearm and utilizing the device’s video output was about the only real solution within arm’s reach (ahem). Like it or not, it’s laced in utility, and you can catch a video of the action after the jump.
Nokia debuts totally fugly 7500 Prism in China
By all accounts, Nokia’s designers are either on a cutting edge so far into the future and so deeply advanced that we can’t understand it, or they’ve all gone off their medication. The bizarre 7500 Prism (which may or may not be the similarly styled 7900) made its debut at a Nokia fashion event in China today, along with the 8600, 8800 Sirocco, 6110 navigator, 5700 XpressMusic, 6500 classic, 6500 slider and the 3500 — though none of them were as totally zany looking as the Prism. The phone’s specs are at least fairly normal, featuring a 2 megapixel camera, microSD slot, a QVGA screen and rocking the S40 (version 5) OS. It’s unclear at this point why the company believes people will want a diamond shaped keyboard, but since the FCC has already approved this model, we’ll soon learn if they really do.
T-Mobile announcing German iPhone deal tomorrow?
Perhaps demonstrating how wide the rift between T-Mobile Europe and T-Mobile USA really is, Germany’s Rheinische Post is reporting that Deutsche Telekom will announce tomorrow that its carrier unit will exclusively offer the iPhone in Germany. Details on the partnership are slim at best, but the two most important nuggets of information seem to be known: November 1 for €450 (about $612), which we assume is for the 8GB unit. Of course, the next biggest question is whether this’ll be an EDGE or 3G unit — and if it’s 3G, can we please get an HSDPA Enabler for $1.99? No?
ScreenSavers
Screen savers are the least concerned things regarding mobile.But I'll try a bit to grab you attention.Please keep checking.
Some Sites
Mobile Videos
Here you will find fun,latest, famous videos of all kinds which can be played on different mobiles.
Following is the list of the sites that provide us free mobile videos.Have a look at.
For some of the sites u may need to register to download.
1)http://www.getjar.com
2)http://www.dotsis.com
3)http://www.funatoz.com/
4)http://mobileshopindia.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=189
5)http://www.zedge.net
6)http://www.kollmobile.com
7)http://www.mobango.com
8)http://www.mobcrop.com
9)http://www.mobile9.com
10)http://www.mastmobile.com
11)http://www.funmaza.com
RingTones
Here you can find al kinds of Ringtones and famous sites for ringtones.you can request for any ringtone, I'll try to get it.
Following is the list of the sites that provide us free mobile RingTones.Have a look at.
For some of the sites u may need to register to download.
1)http://www.getjar.com
2)http://www.dotsis.com
3)http://www.funatoz.com/
4)http://mobileshopindia.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=189
5)http://www.zedge.net
6)http://www.kollmobile.com
7)http://www.mobango.com
8)http://www.mobcrop.com
9)http://www.mobile9.com
10)http://www.mastmobile.com
11)http://www.funmaza.com
Thursday, July 5, 2007
Mobile Themes
Here you will find all sorts of themes,links for themes as well as designed by me.You can ask to create a new theme with a specified background and specified characteristics, if your mobile is a S60 Device.I'm sure I'll make it for you.
All my posts related to themes are linked below.
Please open the link in a new window.
Bollywood Actresses
Actresses
External Sites,which serve free themes
Softwares for PC to Use Mobile Efficiently
These are the softwares to be installed on your PC.
the following link consists of these softwares.
1.3GPConverter.zip
2.LogoFileConvertor.zip
3.Midi2Mp3.zip
4.MMFToMidCanvator.zip
5.Mp32Wav.zip
6.Nok3210RTTTLConvert.zip
7.RingtoneConverter.zip
8.Rmtomp3converter.zip
9.SmartVideoConverter.zip
10.Tone2Midi.zip
11.YAMAHAmmfConverter.zip
Download Link
Wallpapers
Here you will find all sorts of wallpapers for your mobile,download links for wall papers and latest sites for mobile wallpapers.
Just follow the links below.
Please open the links in a new window.
Bollywood Actresses
External Sites
Mobile Softwares
Hi All!
Here you'll find all sorts of software stuff of mobiles as well as PC ie.convertors,softwares for synchronizing mobile and PC etc.I'll keep posting you the latest software links all cracked and ready to use.I have briefed all the posts regarding softwares, you can select whatever you need.Latest post will be at the bottom.
Please open the links in a new window
Softwares for PC to Use Mobile Efficiently
Softwares for Mobile
Symbian OS 9.1 Applications
Latest News
Hello Frenzzz!
Here you go ,the latest news around the world of Mobile Industry and Entertainment.
Just follow the links you have below.Latest link will be at the bottom.
Meizu responds to iPhone launch... with more M8 pictures
Motorola RIZR Z8 Reviewed
Nokia N95 one-ups Apple’s iPhone via unrefined display ‘hack’
Nokia debuts totally fugly 7500 Prism in China
Motorola W385, new LG Chocolates live on Verizon
iPhone nano rumors heating up, destined for Q4?
Nokia’s 8GB N95 confirmed for Q4 release?
The Motorola Z9
LG working on Windows Mobile 6 Prada-esque handset?
Tuesday, July 3, 2007
Lots Of Mobile Games
Lots of Mobile Games
Checkout Some popular Mobile games
all free to download
Games for all common models of nokia, samsung, sony ericcson, motorola
Games are in jar format
Games-2
Tom And Jerry - Mobile Game
Tom And Jerry - Mobile Game
70 Full Screen Games (SE k750, k750i, k750c, k700, w800i)
70 Awsome full screen JAVA Games for Sony Ericsson mobile sets
Sorry but we cannot provide listing
Why not download and see yourself
Synergenix 3D Martial Arts
Game Features
Complex fighting system with: canned combinations, side steps, tech rolls, counter hits, juggle combos and more!
Five characters with unique fighting style, moves and combos!
Three game modes:
“Challenge Mode” - three difficulty levels, each with different set of fighting missions!
“Single Fight” - select opponent, difficulty level and rules…
“Versus Mode” - multiplayer fighting over Bluetooth!
Hidden bonus modes!
Great 3D graphics and super smooth animation!
Support for multiple languages: English, Spanish, Polish and Chinese
.SIS Format
High Quality Sony Ericcson Games
ALL GAMES ARE COMPATIBLE WITH SE K750i, SE w800i, SE K700, SE 550i, SE k600i
Ian Brothers Stick Cricket Game
Ian Brothers “Stick Cricket Game” for S60 Phones (Nokia 6600 and related models)
I couldn’t find a description for this game
But as heard, Its some version of a online cricket game
If anyone finds a nice description of this game, please leave a link in the comment box and submit
Cricket Mania 2005 by 360 Tech
ThreeSixty brings to you Cricket Mania 2005 featuring various teams who perform differently according to their current ratings, different bowler selection who bowl according to their actual nature, spin bowling, full blown fielding etc. You can play a one-day international or a training match. As a captain, you can choose the position of fielders, choose the bowler to bowl for every over and move on to take the bowler’s or batsman’s control and play the game. Cricket Mania 2005 is the most innovative cricket game ever created for mobile and will delight cricket fans worldwide. Get your hands on it and get a feel of playing real cricket, not reel
Apha zone 3d, moto racer for K750i/ D750i/ W800i
Alpha zone 3D, moto racer, moto race grand prix for K750i/ D750i/ W800i series mobile phones
JAR format (java executable) supports many phones models
Games can be transferred via Bluetooth or USB Cable or Infra Red to your mobile set
Leave your replies below.
3D Pool, Snow Boarding for K750i/ D750i/ W800i
Two more games 3D pool and Extreme Air snow boarding 3D for K750i/D750i/W800i
JAR Format
Bluetooth/ USB Cable/ Infra red can be used to transfer files to mobile set.
Extreme Air Snow boarding
Extreme Air Snow boarding 3D
Splinter Cell for K750i/ D750i/ W800i/ K700i
Few Mobile Games in JAR format (java executable)
Files can be transferred to your phones using bluetooth/USB cable/Infra red
Should work fine with K750i/D750i/W800i, k700i and even V800i/Z800i’s.
Splinter Cell 4 Versions
Splinter Cell Extended operations
SplinterCellPT
SplinterCellChao K700F
Splinter Cell 3D
Rally Pro Game (N-Gage) Download
Rally PRO Contest
One of the best ever symbian games
See for your self 10 out of 10!…
also supports blue tooth.
Click below to download this mobile game ( .sis format)
Games
Pirates Of Carribean - At The World's End (Java Game)
Play consists of two mini platforms : arcade style the same as that of Prince of Persia and the cannon battles on the enemy ship and kernels, plus the man to man fights … Great graphics & great gameplay
Click here to download the game (All Java based phones supported)
Krish Cricket (Java Mobile Game)
Lifelike graphics, realistic movements and excellent camera angles show you the game in amazing reality! Superb sound effects add a dimension of exhilaration to the excitement! If you think you’ve played cricket on mobile before, then wait until you try out this challenge!
Munna Bhai MBBS (Mobile Game)
Play as Munnabhai and collect the certificates that everyone wants to give you, from the windows of Dr. Asthana’s hospital.
Play as Munnabhai and collect the certificates that everyone wants to give you, from the windows of Dr. Asthana’s hospital.
As Munnabhai, you must collect the certificates that everyone wants to give you, from the windows of Dr. Asthana’s hospital. You are helped in this endeavour by your friends, who hold a trampoline on which you can jump.Watch out for Dr. Asthana, who appears randomly in the windows and will grab and throw you out of the building! Only one certificate can be collected per bounce. You have 3 turns, after which the game is over!
Supported phones : Nokia 3100, 3120, 3200, 3220, 3300, 3510, 3510i, 3520, 3530, 3590, 3595, 3650, 3660, 5100, 6100, 6108, 6200, 6220, 6230, 6560, 6600, 6610, 6610I, 6630, 6680, 6800, 6810, 6820, 7200, 7210, 7250, 7250I, 7260, 7610, 7650, 8910i, N-Gage, N-GageQD
Click here to download
Spiderman 3 - New Mobile game for series 60
Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever your mobile can… Oh yes. A Spidey movie without an accompanying mobile game would be unthinkable nowadays.
With that in mind, Sony Pictures is set to unleash Spider-Man 3 on a phone near you this month. In traditional style, it’s a 2D platform game, and you can do all the moves you’d expect: web-slinging, crawling up walls, and even Spider Sense.
Combat’s a big part of the game too, with a host of punch and kick attacks, along with combo moves. However, like the upcoming film, Spider-Man’s dark side – in the form of his Black Suit – plays a big role in the action.
Click here to download
James Bond: Casino Royale (Series 60 Java game)
Live like James Bond in Casino Royale as you rappel and shoot your way through 15 life-threatening missions all for Her Majesty’s Secret Service. Casino Royale allows you to experience the sophistication, intelligence and mystery that is Bond…James Bond.
It will work on all java based mobile phones
click here to download (simply put this file in your phone and select install from menu)
Tomb Raider Legend (Game for Series 60 Symbian OS8 Phones)
Ground breaking 3D technology; it’s a 3rd-person action-adventure game with an event-driven story & some of the most immersive 3D graphics ever seen in a mobile game.
The adventure takes Lara around the globe, exploring treacherous tombs and uncovering mysterious
ancient artifacts. Lara Croft’s search for a Pre-Incan relic changes course dramatically when
she meets a dangerous figure from her past.
Download below
Click here to download the SIS file
World-spanning adventure, intrigue & mystery - based in the real world with layers of mythology and tomb-raiding. Striking, detailed, fast-moving graphics show off high-end handset capabilities and legitimize mobile phones as gaming devices.
Virtual Cop (Game for Nokia N-Gage)
Enjoy the first person shooting game
VIRTUAL COP
Only for Engage
(Extract the contents in your pc, Follow instructions in included text file on how to install)
Cricket 2007 S60 Series Games
Download the new Season cricket games
Keeping For Sachin
Click here to download this game
***
Sachins Test
click here to download this game
Gully Cricket
Click here to download this game
Click here to download new Brian Lara Cricket 2007
Camera Controlled Games (Series 60)
These are symbian games that are played with the help of your camera. Its much much fun than the usual joystick or keypad games. Transform your phone from a gun to a soccer field. Use your phones camera to shoot down mosquitoes, hens, killer viruses. Or you can use your phone to guide marbles through tricky mazes by just tilting your phone. Or if you are in the sporty mood practice your penalty shoots by kicking a virtual ball. These games are more interactive and fun playing.
Warning: Play these games only in isolated or secluded areas because when people see you turning around left and right, up and down killing the virus or kicking virtual footballs people looking at you gonna think you lost your mind!!
ATTACK OF THE KILLER VIRUS
This is a real cool innovative game. You are taking penalty. You have a virtual ball in front of you and you gotta kick it to the goal post where a goal keeper stands. It will take some before you get a hang of it. This is a must try game.
***
Marble Revolution
In this game you have to guide a marble through trickey mazes collecting points. The mazes will be filled with points, things that kill you.. Paths that give you away. For playing the came when it is in camera mode just tilt the phone. For example if you tilt it downwards the marble will go in the down position.
****
MOORHEN CAMERA X
In this game you have a rifle. Aim it at the chickens flying around (does chicken fly?) and the ones hidden around. The game is a little hard on the camera controlling. But you will get a hang of it gradually! Try it anyways.. Its Fun!!
Click here to download
*****
Mosquitos
In this game you have a gun and lotsa mosquitos flying around you. You got to shoot them down.
There are mainly 4 modes in the game
Kill Them All: Kill all the mosquitoes in the least minimum time as soon as possible
Just Two Minutes: You have 2 minutes to nail as much as mosquitos as you can..
Each Shot A Hit: In this mode you have 20 shots. You gotta kill as many mosquitos as you can as quickly as possibly without missing once. This is a more interesting and challenging mode of the game.
Whack The Suckers: In this mode the mosquitos are put for a drink. And it wanna drink your blood. Kill the mosquitos before they can bite you and drink your blood. The game ends as soon as a mosquito bites you..
Expect mosquitos from all directions. Ie is 360 degree that means look back once in a while..
THIS IS A REAL COOL GAME!!!
2 New Games for Series 60 Nokia
Download Need for speed Underground 3D
and enjoy the battle arena
with Sky Force
Bollywood Themes
Below is the list of Some Bollywood based Nokia Themes
All themes are in SIS format so they work best on series 60 of Nokia.
Sorry we couldn’t arrange screenshots for these themes, but we are sure you will like them.
Click Theme title to download it.
Aishwarya
Celina
Kareena
Preity
Riya Sen
Celina 2
Aishwarya 2
Aishwarya 3
Amisha
Amrita
Amrita Rao
Aishwarya 4
Aish Coca Cola
Aishwaya 5
Aishwarya 6
Ayesha
Bipasha
Celina 2
Celina 3
Deepal Shah
Diya Mirza
Kajol
Kareena 2
Kareena Chocolate
Kareena Akshay
Kashmira Shah
Koena
Malaika
Megna
Neha Dhupia
Payal Rastogi
Preity 2
Preity 3
Preity 4
Priyanka Chopra
Preity 5
Priyanka 2
Priyanka 3
Priyanka 4
Priyanka 5
Priyanka 6
Priyanka 7
Priyanka 8
Priyanka 9
Priyanka 10
Raveena
Riya 2
Riya 3
Sameera Reddy
Tanushree Datta
Shamita Shetty
Shilpa Shetty
Shilpa 2
Tanushree 2
Urmila Matondkar
Monday, July 2, 2007
Meizu responds to iPhone launch... with more M8 pictures
Nothing really new here, just the first pictures of the latest MiniOne M8 redesign from the sides, top, bottom, and back. Sorry, we’d love to tell you when this 11.8-mm of sexy will break loose Stateside and beyond but we can’t. Still, if it makes you feel any better you can always prop these pictures up next to the dubious import pricing and dates we heard about this morning.
You know, with claims of releasing a game changing 3G, HSDPA with WiFi worldphone packing 16GB of flash by early 2008… isn’t it about time for Meizu to get this project out of their Chinese language bulletin boards and issue an honest to goodness foreign press release? In the mean time, we’ll continue to cast doubt while you go toe-to-toe with product renderings in the gallery over at Engadget. Oh, and before you go… it looks like an iPhone. Ha, you didn’t think you’d escape this post without some kind of Apple reference did ya?
Games
Hello Friends!
Here are a bunch of Games.I hope you will enjoy with this collection.
If you really like these games and feel they are useful,please don't forget to give a comment.
Here is the list of games Follwoed By Download Link
3d-ar-06_t69quw63.zip
3dballoonr_u9hncme9.zip
3dneedford_651i3xu2.zip
3dqblast_5jmex33i.zip
aasf_zb2oxoxz.zip
actraiser_uuwydcs6.zip
alibaba_oyzjenfe.zip
alonsoraci_69u6j8k3.zip
asphalt32d_taijwlwx.zip
atomicunde_iskhxlrw.zip
batmanbegi_7d65az5n.zip
bladetrini_wb3m2tk4.zip
blitzkrieg_i1kr7tel.zip
brucelee_pjuotphv.zip
choo-choop_zyyz1mek.zip
dawnstar_7pxda9cx.zip
desertstor_uwnswfek.zip
destroyall_4hriwkfk.zip
diehard_7pe1fsla.zip
doomrpg240_tv34roqd.zip
elektraass_n12xbs2e.zip
fantasywar_nvwlhzri.zip
fastest_uyp99fi1.zip
fightingro_ds3tdfh6.zip
forse176x2_lx5et2ys.zip
galleondaw_djveo9u4.zip
ghostrecon_nzpr8qpl.zip
helistrike_ws2o5w3s.zip
hotlinkwar_9otk7t4z.zip
i-dragon_t8x8kqtu.zip
keepingfor_lnjo5nda.zip
lorttrivia_by9iov17.zip
lost176x22_y8fu9tuf.zip
madagascar_rdyzowx7.zip
mrbeanraci_w4h4aciz.zip
nufworms_s7ef3nvu.zip
piratesoft_dlwl1pfe.zip
pitfallact_1mdqzydf.zip
powerpuffg_883febt5.zip
princessof_9kba15j2.zip
punisher17_9bbv5e2c.zip
ragnarokma_kr7qembj.zip
realboxing_7xwx68h9.zip
redbaronk7_ln9mcp3m.zip
residentev_i1t39wsv.zip
riverstorm_6uf8jqi4.zip
roviodarke_8254v9hi.zip
sachinsgul_qwtsf5lv.zip
scorpionki_r9rf6ivn.zip
skyforce_whcjx61b.zip
snakesonap_csjk71cm.zip
spiderman3_tcrlbcy5.zip
splinterce_v5kejnjn.zip
stranded17_rvtrj28d.zip
stranded17_wvhykrvj.zip
summergame_c5e6bk54.zip
supermonke_hdzf67oo.zip
taxitycoon_h5nuul2r.zip
teammclare_8rh8158z.zip
thecrow240_ryc9lf4y.zip
theoc_rdletmhw.zip
worldpoolc_vsjaoqj8.zip
Download
Motorola RIZR Z8 Reviewed
Motorola’s multimedia powerhouse “kick slider” Symbian handset has gotten reviewed over at mobile-review.com. We appreciate the extreme detail Eldar and his crew go into when reviewing handsets, and the Z8 review is no different. Although this recently announced handset is not yet available from what we can see, it looks to easily be one of Motorola’s flagships soon. Mobile-review’s breakdown on the Z8 is that it’s a handset with no competition (based on its form factor combined with feature set) along with it having one of the best displays available on any handset. Add to that the Z8’s improvements in the UIQ interface, a better iTap text input system, that QVGA screen, 2 megapixel cam and A2DP Bluetooth and it all adds up to a very well-rounded handset. One caveat: you’ll have to get used to the form factor if you’re not a slider fan.
Normal Jokes
Research on Bullfrogs
Santa the biologist was interested in studying how far bullfrogs can jump. He brought a bullfrog into his laboratory, set it down, and commanded, "Jump, frog, jump!"
The frog jumped across the room.
Santa measured the distance, then noted in his journal, "Frog with four legs jumped eight feet."
Then he cut the frog's front legs off. Again he ordered, "Jump, frog, jump!"
The frog struggled a moment, then jumped a few feet.
After measuring the distance, Santa noted in his journal, "Frog with two legs jumped three feet."
Next, Santa cut off the frog's back legs. Once more, he shouted, "Jump, frog, jump!"
The frog just lay there.
"Jump, frog, jump!" Santa repeated.
Nothing.
Santa noted in his journal, "Frog with no legs - lost its hearing."
Answering machines
You know what I hate about answering machine messages? They go on and on, wasting your time. I mean, all they really need to say is, "We aren't in, leave a message." That's why I've decided to keep mine simple and short. I pledge to you, my caller, that you will never have to suffer through another long answering machine message when you call me...
----
You have reached 934-2435. We picked this machine up at a garage sale in "as-is" condition. You can try to leave a message on it, but we are not sure it will be recorded. If we don't return your call, it means the machine did not work.
----
Hello. I'm David's answering machine. What are you?
----
Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
----
I'm sorry but my answering machine is out of order. I am leaving a broken CD player in its place. It can't take messages either. In fact, it can't even play you a nice tune while you wait to not leave a message.
---
The colonel's order
A COLONEL ISSUED THE FOLLOWING DIRECTIVE TO HIS EXECUTIVE OFFICERS:
"Tomorrow evening at approximately 2000 hours Halley's Comet will be visible in this area; an event which occurs only every 75 years. Have the men fall out in the battalion area in fatigues, and I will explain this rare phenomenon to them. In case of rain, we will not be able to see anything, so assemble the men in the theater and I will show them films of it."
EXECUTIVE OFFICER TO COMPANY COMMANDER:
"By order of the Colonel, tomorrow at 2000 hours, Halley's Comet will appear above the battalion area. If it rains, fall the men out in fatigues, then march to the theater where this rare phenomenon will take place, something which occurs only once every 75 years."
COMPANY COMMANDER TO LIEUTENANT:
"By order of the Colonel be in fatigues at 2000 hours tomorrow evening. The phenomenal Halley's Comet will appear in the theater. In case of rain in the battalion area, the Colonel will give another order, something which occurs once every 75 years."
LIEUTENANT TO SERGEANT:
"Tomorrow at 2000 hours, the Colonel will appear in the theater with Halley's comet, something which happens every 75 years. If it rains, the Colonel will order the comet into the battalion area."
SERGEANT TO SQUAD:
"When it rains tomorrow at 2000 hours, the phenomenal 75-year-old General Halley, accompanied by the Colonel, will drive his comet through the battalion area theater in fatigues."
Beedi jalayi le in english
DAAN DOONG DUDUNG DAAN DOONG DUDUNG......
NOT GLASS
NOT STOLE
COLD AIR IS ALSO AGAINST US
MOTHER IN LAW
NOT GLASS
NOT STOLE
COLD AIR IS ALSO AGAINST
MOTHER IN LAW
ITS SO CHILLY TAKE SOMEBODY'S QUILT GO AND TAKE FIRE FROM NEIGHBORS
STOVE
TAKE FIRE FROM NEIGHBORS STOVE
LIT UP THE CIGGI FROM LIVER OH LOVER
THERE IS LOT OF FIRE IN THE LIVER
DAAN DOONG DUDUNG DAAN DOONG DUDUNG......
DONT NOT TAKE OUT SMOKE FROM THE LIPS DONT NOT TAKE OUT SMOKE FROM THE
LIPS THE WORLD IS VERY CROOKED
LIT UP THE CIGGI FROM LIVER OH LOVER
THERE IS LOT OF FIRE IN THE LIVER
ITS SO CHILLY TAKE SOMEBODY'S QUILT GO AND TAKE FIRE FROM NEIGHBORS
STOVE
TAKE FIRE FROM NEIGHBORS STOVE
NOT GLASS
NOT STOLE
COLD AIR IS ALSO AGAINST
MOTHER IN LAW
ITS SO CHILLY TAKE SOMEBODY'S QUILT GO AND TAKE FIRE FROM NEIGHBORS
STOVE
TAKE FIRE FROM NEIGHBORS STOVE
YEAH YEAH
NOT CRIME
NOT CHAOS
WITHOUT SIN DIED
U CALLED ME I
an MBA & a CA
A MBA and a CA go on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fell asleep. Some hours later, the CA wakes his MBA friend. "Look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
The MBA ponders for a minute.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.
Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?"
The CA is silent for a moment, and then speaks. "Practically...Someone has stolen our tent!"
Shy guy in a Bar
A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, "Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for awhile?
"She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, "No, I won't sleep with you tonight!" Everyone in the bar is now staring at them.
Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.
After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, "I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a graduate student in psychology and I'm studying how people respond to embarrassing situations." To which he responds, at the top of his lungs, "What do you mean $200?!"
Hot water Bath with Bubbles
A survey guy goes to this real tall building, he climbs up the stairs and goes to the first floor. His goal is to find out what people age group people like to do for pleasure.
So he goes to the first floor finds a teenager there, asks him the questions. He replies " I am 18 yrs old and I like to have a hot water bath with bubbles!!"
He's like okay....silly kiddo....goes on to the next floor....an older guy is there he replies " I am 29 years old and I like to have a hot water bath with bubbles!!"
So the survey guy keeps going up and he sees that as he's going further up, all residents are men and the age of people is increasing....he reaches the 2nd last floor to the top. A veryyy old man opens the door.....he asks him the question and old man replies " I am 75 years old and I like to have a hot water bath with bubbles....."
Now the survey guy is like totally preplexed, whole damn building wanted to take a hot water bath, whats wrong, he decides to go to the last floor
He knocks and waits....the door opens and there's a damn hot Blonde who greets him "Hi I am Bubbles "
"A Poor Family"
Once in a kintergarden, a teacher asks all students to write an essay on the topic " A Poor Family".One student gets the lowest marks for writing that essay . The student happens to be the richest girl in the entire class and her essay goes on as.......
She writes:
Ek baar ek bahut hee gareeb family thi, husband aur wife dono gareeb they, do bachey they, woh bhi bahut gareeb they!!
Ghar ke saare naukar bhi gareeb they, ghar ka maali, driver, aur guard bhi bahut gareeb they, ghar ke 4 kuttey bhi gareeb they, 2 din sey chicken nahi khaaya tha, 3 mercedeez car thi, unki bahut time se servicing nahi hui thi,
Ghar ka A.C bhi theek nahi chalta tha ghar mein 1 saal sey paint nahi hua
tha family ko holiday ke liye foregin country gaye bhi 6 mahiney ho
gaye they,ghar ke 5 mein sey 2 TV to chaltey hee nahi they, all in
all, bahut he gareeb family thi!!
Stupid Answers :)
1 Q: Whats the name of ruti's mother?
A: Maruti!!!
Why do they put bells on cows?
Because their horns don't work!
What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
Roamin' Catholic.
What did the apple say to the orange?
Nothing stupid, apples don't talk.
What is the famous last words in surgery?
Ouch
What did yogurt say to milk?
What's up dood?
Why can't skeletons play music in church?
They have no organs!
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Robin, get in the car.
What's long, yellow, and has been out in the sun too long?
A bananna peel
Why did the Mexican push his wife off the cliff?
Tequilla! (to kill her)
How do you catch a squirrel?
Climb into a tree and act like a nut...
Why was George Washington buried at Mount Vernon?
Because he was dead.
What begins with E and ends with E and has a letter in between?
An envelope
only for IT guys
Ramu : Hey.. my submarine software is not sinking into the water!!
what could be wrong?
Somu : may be u have used double
instead of float in the software
HEIGHT
HEIGHT OF ISOLATION:
Two persons sitting side by side using emails to communicate with each other.
HEIGHT OF COWARDICE:
Two persons fighting through emails.
HEIGHT OF HELPLESSNESS:
Receiving no emails for a week.
HEIGHT OF FRUSTRATION:
The email server being down.
HEIGHT OF CARELESSNESS:
Writing a love mail and doing a 'Send All.'
HEIGHT OF ACHIEVEMENT:
A person sending email to a girl wanting to become friends and getting a reply.
HEIGHT OF TIMEPASS:
A person sending email to himself
HEIGTHT OF EXPECTATION:
Sending Indian cricket team an e-mail, wishing them to win a match
HEIGHT OF REPETITION:
Forwarding an email to someone and receiving the same email forwarded back to you by some one in the receiving chain.
HEIGHT OF BROWSING:
You are swimming in the water pond and shout "F1 F1 F1 " instead of shouting "HELP" when you are unable to swim.
HEIGHT of MY FRIENDSHIP:
I am always mailing you even though you don't.
Expensive! Electronic hair dryer
Distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the priest beside her, " Father, may I ask a favor?"
" Of course. What may I do for you?"
" Well, I bought an expensive! Electronic hair dryer that is well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through Customs for me? Under your robes perhaps ?"
" I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie."
" With your honest face, Father, no one will question you."
When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her. The official asked, " Father, do you have anything to declare ?"
" From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare."
The official thought this answer strange, so asked, " And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?"
" I have a marvelous little instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused."
Roaring with laughter, the official said, " Go ahead, Father - - Next!"
What Women Want in Men
Original List (age 22):
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses smartly.
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover
Revised List (age 32):
1. Nice looking (prefer hair on his head)
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at her jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one good tie & socks
8. Appreciates her home-cooked meals, makes tea for her
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week (with her ofcourse !)
Revised List (age 42):
1. Not too ugly ( bald head OK)
2. Doesn't drive off until she's seated in the car
3. Passes the TV remote to her willingly when she asks.
4. Nods head when she's talking (vertically, not horizontally ! )
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Still agrees to visit her parents house.
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends
Revised List (age 52):
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when she's talking
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh undergarments
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Talks to her relatives when they call up on phone
10. Shaves some weekends
Revised List (age 62):
1. Remembers where the bathroom is
2. Doesn't spend much time in the bathroom
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears clothes (his clothes)
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers
Salesman of Coca Cola
A disappointed salesman of Coca Cola returns from his Middle East assignment.
A friend asked, "Why weren't you successful with the Arabs?"
The salesman explained, "When I got posted in the Middle East, I was very confident that I will makes a good sales pitch as Cola is virtually unknown there.
But, I had a problem I didn't know to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters...
First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand... Totally exhausted and panting. Second poster, the man is drinking our Cola and Third, our man is now totally refreshed. Then these posters were pasted all over the place"
"That should have worked," said the friend.
The salesman replied, "Well, not only did I not speak Arabic, I also didn't realise that Arabs Read from Right to Left..."
"What gender is computer?"
A Language teacher was teaching her class that French nouns, unlike their English counterparts, are gramatically designated as masculine or femine.
"'House' in French is femine -- la maison. 'Pencil' in French is masculine -- le crayon."
A student asked, "What gender is computer?"
The french teacher didn't know, and the word wasn't in her french dictionary. So for fun, she split the class into two groups, by gender, and asked them to decide whether "computer" should be a masculine or feminine noun. Both groups were required to provide four reasons for their recommendations.
The men's group decided that computers should definitely be the feminine gender because:
1) No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2) The native languague they use to communicate is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3) Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for possible later retrieval.
4) As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
The women's group however, concluded that computers should be masculine because:
1) In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2) They have a lot of data, but they can't function on their own.
3) They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time, they ARE the problem.
4) As soon as you commit yourself to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
Namaz
TEEEEN AADMI NAMAZ PARH RAHAI THAI,
UN K SAAMNE SE BILI(CAT) GUZRI,
TO PEHLA BOLA ARAY WO DEKHO BILI,
DOOSRA BOLA SHUTUP NAMAZ MIEN NAHI BOLTE AUR
TEEESRA BOLA SHUKAR HAI MIEN NAHI BOLA
Filmi Proposal
Aik Larkay ka Filmi Proposal Uss Ki Girl Friend K Liye:
Bohat Khubsoorat Ghazal Likh Raha Hoon,
Tumhari bari behen Ghazal ko Dekh k Likh Raha Hoon,
Ummed hai tum ussay meray liye phasaogi,
Humari pyaar ki duhai na deyna,
Shaadi k baad dahaij main tum bhi aoogi,
Phasaana thaa ussay phass gayi tum,
Miljayegi woh toh tum hojana Ghum,
Bohat Khubsoorat Ghazal Likh raha hoon,
Tumhari Bari behen Ghazal ko dekh k likh raha hoon,
Ashqui main bohat say chance ayegay,
Shaadi k baad hum tumharay ghar bhi jayegay,
Extra Marital Affair SuperHit Karayegay,
HopeFully Indian Film Murder Part-2 Banayegay,
Malika Sharawat Tum banogi,
Eemran hashmi Bhi tum he hona,
Agar Phuss gayi hum donno aik saath,
toh acha lagayga tum ko khona,
Bohat Khubsurat Ghazal Likh raha Hoon,
Tumhari Barri Behen Ghazal Ko Dekh K Aaj Kal Likh raha hoon
Driving tips for biginners!!!!!!!!!
1. Turn signals will give away your next move. A real driver never uses them.
2. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you, or the space will be filled in by somebody else putting you in an even more dangerous situation.
3. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane change is considered going with the flow.
4. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you have of getting hit.
5. Never, ever come to a complete stop at a stop sign. No one expects it and it will inevitably result in you being rear-ended. If you want your insurance company to pay for a new rear bumper, come to a complete stop at all stop signs.
6. A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before hitting the orange construction barrels.
7. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to ensure that your ABS kicks in, giving a nice, relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs.
8. Never pass on the left when you can pass on the right. It's a good way to scare people entering the highway.
9. Speed limits are arbitrary figures, given only as suggestions, and they are apparently not enforceable during rush hour.
10. Just because you're in the left lane and have no room to speed up or move over doesn't mean that a driver flashing his high beams behind you doesn't think he can go faster in your spot.
11. It is traditional to honk your horn at cars that don't move the instant the light changes.
12. Remember that the goal of every driver is to get there first, by whatever means necessary.
Heaven for orientation
After dying in a car crash, three friends go to Heaven for orientation. They are
all asked the same question, "When you're lying in your casket, and friends
and family are mourning over you, what would you like to hear them say about
you?" The first guy immediately responds, "I would like to hear them say that
I was one of the great doctors of my time, and a great family man."
The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband
and school teacher who made a huge difference in the children of tomorrow."
The last guy thinks for a moment, and then replies, "I guess I'd like to hear
them say, 'Look, he's moving!'"
Murder Of English
Murder of English in Other Countries
English signs in foreign countries...
In a Bangkok temple:
"IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER IF DRESSED AS A MAN."
Cocktail lounge, Norway:
"LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR."
At a Budapest zoo:
"PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE ANIMALS. IF YOU HAVE ANY SUITABLE FOOD, GIVE IT TO THE GUARD ON DUTY."
Doctors office, Rome:
"SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.
Hotel, Acapulco:
"THE MANAGER HAS PERSONALLY PASSED ALL THE WATER SERVED HERE."
Information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner, Japan: "COOLES AND
HEATES: IF YOU WANT JUST CONDITION OF WARM AIR IN YOUR ROOM, PLEASE CONTROL YOURSELF."
Car rental brochure, Tokyo:
"WHEN PASSENGER OF FOOT HEAVE IN SIGHT, TOOTLE THE HORN. TRUMPET HIM MELODIOUSLY AT FIRST, BUT IF HE STILL OBSTACLES YOUR PASSAGE THEN TOOTLE HIM WITH VIGOR."
In a Nairobi restaurant:
"CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER."
On the grounds of a private school:
"NO TRESPASSING WITHOUT PERMISSION."
On a poster at Kencom:
"ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP."
In a City restaurant:
OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.
One of the Mathare buildings:
"MENTAL HEALTH PREVENTION CENTRE."
A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer:
"DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS."
In a Pumwani maternity ward:
"NO CHILDREN ALLOWED."
In a cemetery:
"PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES."
Hotel notice, Tokyo:
"IS FORBIDDEN TO STEAL HOTEL TOWELS PLEASE. IF YOU ARE NOT A PERSON TO DO SUCH A THING IS PLEASE NOT TO HAD NOTIS."
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
"OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR."
In a Tokyo bar:
"SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS."
Hotel brochure, Italy:
"THIS HOTEL IS RENOWNED FOR ITS PEACE AND SOLITUDE. IN FACT, CROWDS FROM ALL OVER THE WORLD FLOCK HERE TO ENJOY ITS SOLITUDE."
Hotel lobby, Bucharest:
"THE LIFT IS BEING FIXED FOR THE NEXT DAY. DURING THAT TIME WE REGRET THAT YOU WILL BE UNBEARABLE."
Hotel elevator, Paris:
"PLEASE LEAVE YOUR VALUES AT THE FRONT DESK."
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
"YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS, AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY."
Hotel catering to skiers, Austria:
"NOT TO PERAMBULATE THE CORRIDORS IN THE HOURS OF REPOSE IN THE BOOTS OF ASCENSION."
Taken from a menu, Poland:
"SALAD A FIRM'S OWN MAKE; LIMPID RED BEET SOUP WITH CHEESY DUMPLINGS IN THE FORM OF A FINGER; ROASTED DUCK LET LOOSE; BEEF RASHERS BEATEN IN THE COUNTRY PEOPLE'S FASHION."
Supermarket, Hong Kong:
"FOR YOUR CONVENIENCE, WE RECOMMEND COURTEOUS, EFFICIENT SELF-SERVICE."
From the "Soviet Weekly":
"THERE WILL BE A MOSCOW EXHIBITION OF ARTS BY 15,000 SOVIET REPUBLIC
PAINTERS AND SCULPTORS. THESE WERE EXECUTED OVER THE PAST TWO YEARS."
In an East African newspaper:
"A NEW SWIMMING POOL IS RAPIDLY TAKING SHAPE SINCE THE CONTRACTORS HAVE THROWN IN THE BULK OF THEIR WORKERS."
Hotel, Vienna:
"IN CASE OF FIRE, DO YOUR UTMOST TO ALARM THE HOTEL PORTER."
An advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
"TEETH EXTRACTED BY THE LATEST METHODISTS."
Kya tumhe May 30 contd
Tourist agency, Czechoslovakia:
"TAKE ONE OF OUR HORSE-DRIVEN CITY TOURS. WE GUARANTEE NO MISCARRIAGES."
In the window on a Swedish furrier:
"FUR COATS MADE FOR LADIES FROM THEIR OWN SKIN."
The box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong:
"GUARANTEED TO WORK THROUGHOUT ITS USEFUL LIFE."
In a Swiss mountain inn:
"SPECIAL TODAY - NO ICE-CREAM."
Airline ticket office, Copenhagen:
"WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS."
On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
"IF THIS IS YOUR FIRST VISIT TO THE USSR, YOU ARE WELCOME TO IT."
Munnabhai And Circuit Murdering the English
Munnabhai with Circuit strikes again!
Circuit: Bhai america mein address puchega tho kya bolne ka
Munna: Dhobhi Ghaat
Circuit: Bhai english mein bolneka tho?
Munna: Washington
Circuit: Bhai idhar aane ko kya bolna
Munna: Come Here
Circuit: Bhai phir udhar jaaneko kya bolthe hai?
Munna: Pehle udhar jaaneka phir bolneka come here.
Circuit: Bhai yeh kaisa bolne ka - chale hat hawa aane de
Munna: simple hain yaar - Hey u move sideways let the air force come in.
Circuit: Bhai tum tho pass ho gela bhai
Munna: Yes bro i have just passed away
Munna: Abhi tu bol eh mamu bheja mat phira
Circuit: Mother's brother dont rotate my brain
Munna: Yeh bol idhar aa khajhur detha hun karcha pani {kajhur yaane date}
circiut: Come with me for a date i will pay u
Munna: Ab yeh bol apun ko bahut sardi ho gayi hai
Circuit: I got big winter in small nose
Master Ramlal Trying
# About his family :
--------------
I have two daughters. Both of them are girls...(?)
# At the ground :
-------------
All of you, stand in a straight circle.
There is no wind in the balloon.
# To a boy, angrily :
I talk, he talk, why you middle middle talk ?
# Giving a punishment :
-------------------
You, rotate the ground four times...
You, go and under-stand the tree...
You three of you, stand together separately.
Why are you late - say YES or NO ....(?)
# Sir at his best :
---------------
Sir had once gone to a film with his wife. By chance, he happened to
see one of our boys at the theatre, though the boy did not see them.
So the next day at school... ( to that boy ) - "
Yesterday , I saw you WITH MY WIFE at the Cinema Theatre"
Inside the Class :
----------------
Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come in.
Open the doors of the window. Let the Air Force come in.
Cut an apple into two halves - take the bigger half.
Shhh...Quiet, boys...the principal just passed away in the corridor
You, meet me behind the class. (meaning AFTER the class .. )
Both of u three, get out of the class.
Close the doors of the windows please. I have winter in my nose today
...
Take Copper Wire of any metal especially of Silver.....
Take 5 cm wire of any length....
some common english sayings translate in hindi
Have a nice day!
----- * Achcha din lo!
What's up?
----- *Uppar kya hai?
You're kidding!
----- *Tum bachcha bana rahe ho!
Don't kid me!
----- * Mera bachcha mat banaao!
Yo, baby! What's up?
-----* Beti Yo, uppar kya hai?
Cool man!
-----* Thandaa aadmi!
Check this out, man!
----* Iskee chaanbeen karo, aadmi!
Don't mess with me, dude.
----- * Mere saath gandagi mat karo, e vyakti.
She's so fine!
----- * Woh itnee baareek hai!
Listen buddy, that chick's mine, okay!?
----- * Suno dost, woh chooza mera hai, theek?
Hey good looking; what's cooking?
----* Arrey sundarta ki devi; kya pakaa rahee ho?
Are you nuts?
----- * Kya aap akhrot hain?
Son of a gun.
----- * Bachcha bandook ka.
Rock the party.
---- * Party mein patthar feko.
And the best ones are.....
How do you do?
----- * Kaise karte ho?
Keep in touch!
----- * Chhoote Raho.
Lets hang out!
----- * Chalo bahar latakte hain
The peon
The peon in a office is trying hard to learn english. U ppl kust knw how funny it can get. Here r a few phrases he uses along with wht he actually wants to say whn he uses them
1. Dont shut up. (Keep quite)
2. I am agree with u. (I agree with u)
3. There is head ache in my head. (My head is aching)
4. Supposed to I am not thr.... (Suppose I'm not there...)
5. The cold water is freeze cold. (The water is freeze cold)
6. I am leaving tomorrow. (I m on leave tomorrow)
And best and funniest of all is the look on his face whn someone starts to tlk with him in english. I have no words to describe that. The closest I can get to describe it is to ask u to imagine the face of a sex starved male chimp who gets a female gorilla....
English classes.....
1. Dont dare talk in front of my back. (wont talk at all!!)
2. Both of you three get out of the class.
3. Why are u so late? Say yes or no!!!!!!!! (kill me!!!)
4. Take 5cm wire of any length. (really!!!!)
5. I have 2 daughters both are girls. (what u sayin!!)
6. All of you stand in a straight circle. (this is too much paaji!!)
7. Quiet. The principal just passed away. (how terrible!!)
8. Give me a red ink pen of any colour. (purple chalega kya sir!!)
9. Absentees stand up. (bhooooooooooooooooot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Bihar Driving License...
================================================== ========
DERIVING LICENSE APPLIKASON PHOROM
------------------------------------------ -----------------------
NOTE: Please do not soot the person at the applikason kounter.
He will give you the licen.
If you dot know how to fill ,copy from your phriend (dost)applikason.
For phurthar instructions, see bottom applikason.
1. Last name:
(_) Yadav (_) Sinha (_) Pandey (_) Misra (_) Dont no
(Check karet box)
2. phust name:
(_) Ramprasad (_) Lakhan (_) Sivprasad (_) Jamnaprasad (_) Dont no
(Check karet box)
3. Age:
(_) Less than phipty (_) Greater than phipty (_) Dont no
(Check karet box)
4. Sex: ____ M _____(F) _____ not sure _____not applicable
5. Chappal Size: ____ Lepht ____ Right
6.Occupason:
(_) Politison (_) Doodhwala (_) Pehelwaan (_) House wife (_) Un-employed
(Check karet box)
7. Number of children libing in the household: ___
8. Number that are yourj: ___
9. Mather name: _______________________
10. Phather Name: ____________________ (If not no,leabe blank)
11. Ejjucason: 1 2 3 4 (Circle highest kilass attended)
12. Dental rekard:
(_) Ellow (_) Berownish-ellow (_) Berown (_) Belack (_) Other -__________ Give egjhakt color
(Check karet box)
13.Your thumb imparesson :
____________________________
(If you are copying from another applikason pharom, pleaje do not copy thumb impression also. Pleaje provide your own thumb impression.)
PELEAJE DO NOT USE PHINGERS OF YOUR LEGS
Use thumb on your lepht hand only. If you dont have le pht hand, use your thumb on right hand. If you do not have right hand, use thumb on lepht hand.
NOTE : IF YOU DONT HAVE BOTH HANDS, YOU CANNOT DERIVE.
WE ARE VARY ISTRICT ABOUT THIS
UPSC (IAS) Examinations
You'll forget your English by the time you finish reading this. This is a true essay written by a Bihari candidate at the UPSC(IAS)Examinations. The candidate has written an essay on the Indian cow:
Indian Cow
HE IS THE COW. "The cow is a successful animal. Also he is 4 footed, And because he is female, he give milks, [ but will do so when he is got child.] He is same like-God, sacred to Hindus and useful to man. But he has got four legs together. Two are forward and two are afterwards. His whole body can be utilised for use. More so the milk. Milk comes from 4 taps attached to his basement. [ horses dont have any such attachment]
What can it do? Various ghee, butter, cream, curd, why and the condensed milk and so forth. Also he is useful to cobbler, watermans and mankind generally. His motion is slow only because he is of lazy species, Also his other motion.. gober] is much useful to trees, plants as well as for making flat cakes[like Pizza] , in hand and drying in the sun.
Cow is the only animal that extricates his feeding after eating. Then afterwards she chew with his teeth whom are situated in the inside of the mouth. He is incessantly in the meadows in the grass. His only attacking and defending organ is the horns, specially so when he is got child. This is done by knowing his head whereby he causes the weapons to be paralleled to the ground of the earth and instantly proceed with great velocity forwards. He has got tails also, situated in the backyard, but not like similar animals. It has hairs on the other end of the other side. This is done to frighten away the flies which alight on his cohesive body hereupon he gives hit with it.
The palms of his feet are soft unto the touch. So the grasses head is not crushed. At night time have poses by looking down on the ground and he shouts . His eyes and nose are like his other relatives. This is the cow.......
We are informed that the candidate passed the exam, and is now an IAS somewhere in Bihar
ENGLISH OF A DESI TEACHER....
In class
* Open the doors of the window. Let the atmosphere come in.
* Open the doors of the window. Let the air force come in.
* Cut an apple in two halfs- take the bigger half.
* Shhh...Quiet, boys...the principal just passed away outside
* Both of you three, get out of the class.
* Close the doors of the window.
* Take Copper Wire of any metal specially of Silver.
* Take 5 cm wire of any length.
About family
* I have two daughters both of them are girls
At the play ground
* All of you, stand in a straight circle.
* There is no wind in the balloon.
Punishment :
* You, rotate the ground four times
* You, go and under-stand the tree
* You three of you, stand together separately.
* Why you are late - say YES or NO
Heres a good one!
heres a good one!
Bill Gates arrived in India to discuss out his plans. He announced
that Microsoft plans to release a Windows 2000 version in Hindi and it will
be called Khidkiyan 2000.Here are some Windows related terms that may be used in Khidkiyan 2000.
Phaail = File
Bachao = Save
Aise Bachao = Save As
Subko Bachao = Save All
Mujhe Bachao = Help
Chuno = Select
Sab Chuno = Select All
Dhoondo = Find
Firse Dhoondo = Find Again
Hilao = Move
Dak = Mail
Dakiya = Mailer
Paas se dhekho = Zoom
Door se dhekho = Zoom out
Kholo = Open
Band Karo = Close
Naya = New
Badli karo = Replace
Bhaago = Run
Chhaapo = Print
Dekh Ke Chhaapo = Print Preview
Nakal = Copy
Kaato = Cut
Chipkao = Paste
Ispesal Chipkao = Paste Special
Goli Maaro = Delete
Nazaara = View
Auzaar = Tools
Auzaar ka dabba = Toolbar
Khuli Chaadar = Spreadsheet
Iska Bhi Naam Nahin Aata = Database
Ghusao = Insert
Ped = Tree
Thooso = Compress
Chooha = Mouse
Tik-Tik Karo = Click
Idhar-se-Udhar. Udhar-se-Idhar = Scrollbar
Chal Phoot = Exit
Murder of English
Do You Have an experience like this, if you have add as comment
A man telling someone about his family
I have two daughters and both of them are girls
My teacher feeling hot saw the queue for submission and sed....
I M HOT COME ONE BY ONE....!!! '
Our Maths prof used to say:
I have 2 daughters... and both are girls.
our hostel warden used to use all the above sentences (think he still does..)
open the window, let the air-force come in
the bicycle is under-standing the tree
once he got angry with a student n wants to send him out of the classs, but forgets what to tell. then..
he says 'follow me' n goes out of the class room. after the student follows him out then he says 'dont follow me' n comes back to the class
old one....
don't make noise the principal just passed away
both of u three get up and get out from the class.
saw u at d movies wid my wife
teacher going out of the class
u 2 come here..................
stand here..........
himself goes in the class
our teacher...
our mechanic professor (40+ male). who will satisfy me on oral properly will get good marks.
Well Y
The Leave Applications
"Since I have to go to my village to sell my land along with my wife, please sanction me one-week leave."
This is from Oracle Bangalore:
From an employee who was performing the "mundan" ceremony of his 10 year old son:
"as I want to shave my son's head, please leave me for two days.."
Another gem from CDAC.
Leave-letter from an employee who was performing his daughter's wedding:
"as I am marrying my daughter, please grant a week's leave.."
From H.A.L. Administration Dept:
"As my mother-in-law has expired and I am only one responsible for it, please grant me 10 days leave."
Another employee applied for half day leave as fol
"Since I've to go to the cremation ground at 10 o-clock and I may not return, please grant me half day casual leave"
An incident of a leave letter:
"I am suffering from fever, please declare one-day holiday."
A leave letter to the headmaster:
"As I am studying in this school I am suffering from headache. I request you to leave me today"
Another leave letter written to the headmaster:
"As my headache is paining, please grant me leave for the day."
Covering note:
"I am enclosed herewith..."
Another one:
"Dear Sir: with reference to the above, please refer to my below..."
Actual letter written for application of leave:
"My wife is suffering from sickness and as I am her only husband at home I may be granted leave".
Letter writing:-
"I am well here and hope you are also in the same well."
A candidate's job application:
"This has reference to your advertisement calling for a 'Typist and an Accountant - Male or Female'... As I am both(!! )for the past several years and I can handle both with good experience, I am applying for the post.
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